Back Pain Blues

[starless_sky]

 Life was going easily for the prince and his husband. Ravus wasn't 'new' anymore and Lucis was getting more fond of him by the day. Used to him was perhaps a better way to say it but Noctis refused to give up on Ravus acclimating to Insomnia. He would find a way to blend him with their people better. They would learn to love him. If nothing else, the people loved Noctis more. 

Ravus had managed to convince him to get more work done and he'd actually started to enjoy it. He made more public appearances now, he volunteered more and not just at the animal shelter, he attended his fathers' meetings with the council, and he upheld his etiquette more... All in all Ravus was a great influence and it was awful. His lazy days of manga and video games were in the distant past. What Noct wouldn't do just for one afternoon of idleness... 

It's not like it was his choice. Ravus need only imply there was sex as a reward and Noct would have no choice. It was embarrassing to watch himself but he was a good little boy, obedient as a trained dog so long as he got his carrot at the end of it all. Of course, that wasn't to say he didn't sleep with Ravus just for its own sake either. It was his favorite pastime now, even more than fishing if he were being totally honest. Ravus had managed to thwart several attempts to sneak off to go fishing with the promise of an afternoon romp. 

This week was a busy one and Noctis had done the responsible thing and went straight to sleep when he got into bed. He had to rest to get ready for tomorrow which would be long and hectic, assuming nothing went wrong and made it worse. Only... he couldn't sleep anymore. It was the wee hours and Ravus was out, Noct had been woken up by his childhood companion; back pain. He'd never fully healed from when he was a child and every once in a while it reared its ugly head. 

He knew there was nothing that would work on it, he simply had to ride it out. Sometimes it would quit as fast as it started or he could nod off despite it all and it would disappear while he slept. 

No such luck tonight. He lay on his side facing away from Ravus, trying to keep his breathing calm, trying to focus on each breath and get through this moment and the next. It had to calm down soon. He gripped the sheets while his breathing got shallow and quick but he wouldn't move. Moving made it worse. 

At least Ravus was getting sleep tonight. 

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[sonoftenebrae]

Sharing a bed had taken some getting used to. Not just the sex part, but actually sleeping in close proximity to another person. Ravus had adapted, though, even quietly coming to enjoy the warmth of his husband's body against his as they slept...

...which is why he stirs in the middle of the night, feeling a chill that is no longer familiar to him. Noctis is never this far away from him. His little husband is usually like a cat, sprawled out with no concerns about personal space.

Ravus' senses come to him slowly, not sensing a threat but unable to fall back asleep. He listens to Noctis' breathing, trying to pinpoint what could be out of place. Noctis is still... too still... but his breaths are quick, not soporific. With how much his husband loves sleep, Ravus can't simply ignore this.

"Noctis, are you awake?" he asks in a low voice.

[starless_sky]

Ravus was one of the few lucky people Noctis was comfortable around and that meant he had no personal space when it came to sleeping. Noct liked how warm Ravus got and he was a snuggler at heart though he would never admit it. Noct had taken to co-sleeping a bit easier than Ravus. He didn't realize how badly he needed someone in his life until he had one.

Still, that didn't mean he wanted to lean on Ravus for everything. He saw his husband differently than he did Ignis, who he used as a servant and a friend but not often as an equal. Ravus was his partner and someone he wanted to look good in front of. It didn't matter what Ignis thought of him but he wanted Ravus to still respect him. He didn't want to be a wimp.

"...Yeah, did I wake you? Sorry." he tried to say it plainly, in a normal tone that betrayed nothing.

[sonoftenebrae]

The tone is guarded, but Ravus takes note that Noctis doesn't turn to face him to answer. True, their room is too dark to really see more than the faintest outline of one another, but usually such movements are instinctive.

He reaches for the bedside table to flick on a lamp.

"It is not like you to be awake when you could be sleeping." Which, perhaps, Ravus is too hard on him for. When was the last time his husband took a break? Ravus has been pleased with how productive he's become, but... just like with Lunafreya, Noctis has the weight of so much expectation placed upon him and Ravus is powerless to relieve the burden.

"Is something on your mind?"

[starless_sky]

Noctis wanted to look at Ravus, wanted to curl into him and lose his pain in the motion but it was a fantasy. He had to ride this out alone, no sense in bringing Ravus down with him. Noct closed his eyes as the light came on. It was bright, almost too bright, he had to squint.

"Even I can't sleep sometimes." he chuckled. "Weird huh?" Ravus had good reason to be hard on him. He'd earned it even if he was working a lot lately. He deserved a little break but he wanted to live up to Ravus' hopes. He needed to do better or he wouldn't do a good job fulfilling his role with Luna either. She and Ravus were both depending on him.

"Nothing in particular." other than how nice it would be to be out of pain. It was all he could focus on and Ravus' words were a distant second place. Despite that he felt really awkward not facing Ravus now. It felt like he was mad and avoiding his gaze or something. He reached out a hand, turning ever so slightly in order to do so. He just wanted to hold Ravus' hand, maybe get his husband to spoon him without having to ask it out loud. He couldn't stop how his breath hitched as he did so. Stupid move, really.

"Come here, go back to sleep."

[sonoftenebrae]

Ravus leaves the light on as he shifts closer to Noctis. What was that little waver in his voice? He takes Noctis' hand and gives him a little tug to urge him to turn over and come into his arms, the way Noctis usually snuggles into him when Ravus is too tired to pretend he doesn't like it.

"Or, since we both find ourselves awake..." He lets the suggestion hang in the air between them. It's not the first time they've woken up during the night and used the opportunity for a quick (or not so quick) session of lovemaking. They both have duties to attend to in the morning, but they can sacrifice a few minutes sleep. Especially if it will ease whatever unspoken worry Noctis is ruminating over.

[starless_sky]

Normally this would be exactly what he'd want his husband to say. Curse the six that this is the time when he wants to spend the night with him. He never wanted to be 'that husband' who made excuses to get out of sex. He loved sex, he made it no secret. He even considered it for a moment. Would it help? Or would he just cry in agony? He really couldn't hide his pain if they did it. He'd likely never relax enough to get started.

The tug was what did it. Noctis yelped. A soft little yelp that said it all. He held his breath and rolled over. He may as well be in agony with Ravus.

"Dunno that that's in the cards for me tonight. Wish I could, you know I would." his breath shook and Ravus ought to feel he was trembling.

[sonoftenebrae]

Ravus looks into Noctis' eyes, now completely in concerned mode. Noctis has never failed to leap at the offer of sex. He must really be in pain.

He combs Noctis' bangs back from his forehead so he can look him over unobstructed.

"What happened? Are you injured? I can have a doctor summoned."

His tone demands answers, because he can't Solve the Problem if he does not know what it is. Lord Commander Ravus, trying to devise a plan of attack.

[starless_sky]

Just that touch on his forehead was enough to help give him hope. He wasn't alone now. He smiled at Ravus feeling like a lost refugee on a lifeboat who'd been found by a rescue ship. His face was pale and he didn't have his normal humor in his eyes. He looked tired and yet all too active and alive. He couldn't rest.

He smiled wider when Soldier Ravus showed up. He was cute, not at all intimidating this time since Noctis wasn't a soldier with him but the mission itself.

"Don't bother. There's nothing they can do, Ravus." they tried in vain for years since returning from Tenebrae. "You remember my scar on my back?" the reason they met in Tenebrae, no less. "It flairs up sometimes and when it does all I can do is wait it out. No doctor has ever made it better." the only person who could help was Queen Sylva and she was gone. Plus it had been too long for Luna to have any effect, Noctis was convinced he would live like this forever.

[sonoftenebrae]

Ravus scowls. "Useless Lucian medicine. It's a wonder any of your people make it to an advanced age."

Now Tenebraen practice, that is what his husband needs. Ravus can't do the magic Lunafreya and his mother could do, but his mother had taught him what she could that didn't touch upon the ancient Fleuret powers.

A little less harshly, he murmurs, "Let me get a look at it. If you cannot turn, I can help move you."

[starless_sky]

Noctis just smiles. "Yeah. I know." not that he was putting his own country down but at the same time he felt the frustration. Ravus was just showing his care and concern, anything that failed him in his missions was worthless. Right now he got to be the mission.

All of Ravus' precious attention was fixed on him.

"You've seen it before, don't touch it. It'll just make it worse. I'm okay, I can get through it." he clung loosely to Ravus. Please don't make him turn, husband. He just got settled, please don't make him roll over or worse, roll him over.

Despite his protests, Noctis wouldn't fight Ravus if he rolled him over anyway. It was too much to try to move his back at all. He'd simply go with it while whining.

The wound was the same familiar scar but the muscles and nerves inside were angry and stiff. It was the sort of injury that killed normal men or at best permanently disabled them.

[sonoftenebrae]

Sorry, Noctis, Ravus grew up with Lunafreya, and has learned to harden himself to any amount of reckless self-sacrifice. He won't tolerate it from her, and he won't tolerate it from his husband either.

"Bear with it for just a moment." He wraps his arms around Noctis's body, doing his best to support his spine as he flips him onto his stomach. Simply letting Noctis suffer in silence is not an acceptable option.

"I will be gentle," he declares, ignoring Noctis' plea not to touch. Pushing Noctis' night shirt up to bare the scarred flesh, Ravus lets his sword-callus fingers run a gentle line up Noctis' back and back down parallel to his spine, feeling the knotted muscles without quite touching the actual problem area.

[starless_sky]

How lucky he is to have such a stubborn oaf for a husband. He said no, please just accept this isn't fixable.

"Nooo, why? It's going to get worse. Ah- not so--" and then he was on his belly. He laid still taking a steadying breath. Then the words of warning, 'I will be gentle' which did nothing to relax Noctis.

"What? No, wait wait--" he pauses when Ravus lifts his shirt and he's deathly silent as Ravus touches him. His fingers are poised ready to grab the bedsheets. He has his head turned watching Ravus' every move.

"It won't work, Ravus. Please, if you do this I won't be able to walk tomorrow."

[sonoftenebrae]

Just a simple touch has Noctis in such a blind panic.

"When was the last time you tried to relieve your pain?" How many years since you addressed this injury, Noctis? Because Ravus has a feeling it is to be counted in years, not months.

"If you cannot walk tomorrow, I vow to stay by your side and wait upon you hand and foot."

[starless_sky]

"I don't try to relieve it anymore. Nothing works. I'm telling you Ravus this is going to make it worse." he hadn't tried in ages, this was just the miserable routine he had.

"I need to walk tomorrow. Why are you offering for me to stay put?" shouldn't he want to leave Noctis to his own devices so they could continue to work?

"... If you promise you won't leave me... Then you can try. But don't say I didn't tell you so."

[sonoftenebrae]

"Although I could not inherit her magic, my mother taught me what she could. Let me try."

He'll broker no protests. The fact that Noctis seems to think he would want Noctis to work while he was injured just makes Ravus more stubborn to solve this problem. Noctis is his husband to care for, in sickness and in health. Maybe Noctis does not believe Ravus cares for his well-being, but Ravus does.

"You have my word. I would not try if I did not plan to succeed, but if you are not satisfied with my efforts, I will be yours to command until your convalescence ends."

And with that, he kneels beside Noctis and gently strokes both hands down Noctis's spine, feeling the scarred flesh and locating the largest of the knots. He increases the pressure, beginning to massage the kinks out.

[starless_sky]

It's not that he believes Ravus doesn't care about him. More that he thought Ravus would allow him to follow his own routine for his pain giveth they had work to do. He'd never had someone step in to try to help him regardless of his response. Maybe the other people who left him to his misery didn't really care... At least not like Ravus does.

"Your mom... Is the last person to make any progress with it." he missed her. She was a touch intimidating like Ravus. But gentle underneath and warm... Also like Ravus...

He stiffened as Ravus started to work on the problem. Noctis wouldn't interfere unless it was truly horrible. Still, his breathing got quicker while his husband massaged his back. He was alright, no white-knuckling the sheets yet.

Noct's injury was deep, angry, and old. It was more than many of Ravus' soldiers ever got before being medically discharged.

[sonoftenebrae]

"My sister has grown into her skills. She will be able to do more for you." Ravus plans to call upon her in the morning. Noctis' pain has persisted only because Lunafreya is unaware of it, he's sure.

But Lunafreya's future intervention does not solve tonight's problem. For now, it is only Ravus who can help his husband. He is under no illusion that it will be easy for Noctis, but perseverance is the Fleuret way, and Noctis married into the family.

"I was eager to learn anything I could to assist her, back when I was a boy." Idle chatter is not Ravus' habit, but he sees the value in trying to keep Noctis distracted until he is able to make progress on the injury. "I was determined to make myself useful, which was a first for a male Fleuret."

He works his hands into Noctis' back. Tough love, pain to relieve pain. Ravus will do what he needs to do to get results.

[starless_sky]

"She doesn't have to come here just for this." they will see her soon anyway but he would never turn down the chance to see Luna. She was welcome to stay anytime, in fact Noctis would be pleased if she wanted to live in the Citadel part time.

Still, the promise of her didn't detract from the present moment and Ravus was trying hard to help him. Noct was confident that none of his pain was lost on his husband and in fact Ravus must pick up on it in ways Noctis did not given that Ravus was a soldier.

Perseverance in this instance is something Noct was familiar with. It was one way he could blend right in to the Fleuret family. If only his mother could see him now.

"You were always like that back then." Noctis grunted as Ravus worked on him. It was agony but he had to get through it. He wouldn't cry out or moan. The only indication Noct gave of struggling was gripping the sheets tight.

"You always wanted to make your nation better. Even I could see that... I hardly believe you're the first male Fleuret to try to learn the healing craft. I mean. What about your father? Didn't he help?"

[sonoftenebrae]

"She will come, as it is her duty to do." Though it is admittedly a duty she will not mind, and an excuse to see both her brother and her dear friend. Besides, Lunafreya would be furious with both of them if she found out Ravus had delayed calling upon her.

He keeps massaging, moving between various points on Noctis' back so as not to overwhelm one single spot as he tries to loosen the locking muscles.

"Didn't I make you cry once? Lunafreya said it was my 'resting disapproval face'. I was convinced you were terrified of me back then." A younger Ravus had not, admittedly, been impressed with the tiny, sickly prince of Lucis, which hadn't helped matters. Noctis had eventually warmed up to him, though, either repeated exposure or Lunafreya's influence tempering Ravus' fearful expressions.

"My father? No. He beget a female heir in his second attempt, then parted ways with my mother. That was his sole contribution to Tenebrae." Which had been fine, honestly. Sylva Via Fleuret had had her queendom well in hand.

[starless_sky]

"I mean... She could just... Come over. For us. You know her brothers?" he's her brother in-law not just her bff. Plus Ravus was right, she'd never let Noctis live it down for not telling her about his pain in years prior. He let it go too long. Luna would come just to scold him.

Ravus is merciful for moving his hands to new places. Noctis isn't hissing in pain but staying in one spot would hurt too much in no time. Still, Noct's muscles were not easily relaxed. They'd been in disrepair for a long time, none of this would be easy to fix.

"You really think I'd fall for a guy who made me cry? You do have resting bitch face but that didn't... Back then... I never cried about it." that he'll admit to. Ravus had been intimidating and Noctis felt as pathetic and sickly as he looked


"I was scared of a new place and new people. I didn't know when that daemon would return to finish me off."

Then he listened to the worst thing Ravus had to say so far. "Your father abandoned you!? That's... I don't understand why. Ravus that's awful. I'm sorry.'

[sonoftenebrae]

"Fortunately, she can do both." Ravus sees no need to consider which motivation is stronger. The official duty will make it easier for Lunafreya to clear her schedule, and her devotion to her brothers will make it a sacrifice she makes gladly.

His hands have warmed from their proximity to Noctis' skin, and little by little, he works his fingers into the knotted muscles.

"I didn't think you'd fall for me, period. It was... unexpected." Back in those early days, everyone had thought Noctis and Lunafreya would be matched, not her sour older brother.

"It's not an uncommon thing, the Queen of Tenebrae ruling on her own. I didn't feel the absence of him when he left. My mother and sister were everything to me. None of us needed him."

[starless_sky]

"True..." he'd gladly clear his schedule for her too. Official duty or not he'd make it look like official duty on paper so he could see her with Ravus. Even if it was for her scolding.

Ravus' hands felt better...ish. They were still digging into him and his fingers closed around the bedsheets in a white-knuckle grip.

"Well, surprise. I didn't either until it was happening." he thought he'd marry Luna too. He thought he'd have to fake it and pretend he wasn't into her brother for the rest of his life but fate worked in his favor this time.

"If he was willing to abandon you then you're right, you didn't need him but that's still pathetic." he spares no amount of venom in his words. "I hope you don't expect to do that with me. I'll hunt you down."

[sonoftenebrae]

Ravus' hands still for just a moment. "Do you think so little of my devotion, husband? I swore vows to you, and I intent to uphold them."

He would even if he did not like Noctis. That he has become so fond of him is just extra incentive to remain faithfully by his side.

He resumes his massage, pressing in a little harder now, determined to give his husband relief.

"This will get worse before it gets better. Try to endure it, Noctis. I would not cause you pain except to see you delivered from it."

[starless_sky]

He smirked over his shoulder. "For you, it was only a joke. I know you aren't like that." he had faith at least. "Though the reminders are nice..." hearing Ravus talk about his vows is the closest thing he's got to lovey-dovey sap.

"You think I'd be laying here taking it if I didn't know that? I stopped letting doctors touch it." they always made it worse and not in a way that got better later. He neglected the thing and forced his way through the pain when he was running, fighting, sitting or standing for too long. Ravus surely must have seen his gate when he was in pain and still needed to move.

"Still... usually I enjoy your hands on me."

[sonoftenebrae]

"When you are recovered, I will ensure you enjoy my hands to the fullest." It's a bolder promise than Ravus usually makes, a concession to Noctis' current condition. The offer of future pleasure to dull the present pain.

"Though you should pursue some sort of remedy. I'll consult with my sister when she arrives, make arrangements for someone Tenebraen to see to you as needed." Because obviously not a single Lucian doctor is up to the task.

Of course, that person could be Ravus, though he is willing to entrust his husband's care to an expert from his homeland if one can be found. Only the best for Noctis.

[starless_sky]

"Oooh, like how?" he hardly expects Ravus to describe how he'd fuck him later but he could hope for it. Not that he was going to be titillated right now anyway.

"I've tried everything I know other than Luna." and he didn't want to strain her too much with this, he didn't think it was even fixable after how much time had passed. Even Queen Sylva had to take more drastic measures to help get his body to respond to her healing. Who could expect a Lucian doctor to be able to compete with an oracle? Who could expect a Tenebraen one to do any better?

"How do you know they won't have the same results? That's a lot to ask of them to come all the way here for nothing. Maybe we should go there."

[sonoftenebrae]

"Another massage, for pleasure rather than pain." And perhaps more than that, but Ravus isn't inclined to dirty talk, especially outside of the act itself. But hopefully the suggestions will take root in Noctis' imaginative brain.

"They would consider it the highest honor to be called upon... though if this is your way of suggesting we are due a trip to Fenestala Manor, I suppose that could be arranged."

Ravus understands that he demands much of his young husband. He does the same for himself and his sister. But just because all three of them have roles and duties that must be attended, it does not mean there cannot be the occasional moments of respite.

With Noctis lying beside him, wracked with pain that Ravus is trying desperately to relieve, Ravus is willing to concede a vacation might be in order.

[starless_sky]

"I can already imagine it." a lie, he was in agony, there was no imagining being aroused. Plus Ravus' dirty talk was dryer than his humor if that was possible.

"That's great and all but it's a lot to ask anyway. Unless they want to see Insomnia in which case... sure, have them all come." he paused then his breath grew ragged as Ravus worked on a tender part of his back. "I think... we're overdue for a visit there, don't you?" he always liked to go there. He got to be spoiled rather than be working all the time. The staff at Fenestala Manor were so nice and he got to eat his favorite dessert. And fish. And it was quiet.

Ravus' definition of occasional and Noct's differed greatly at times.

"Besides, it's been a while since I got to ride you in your bed back home." he forced a smirk. "Ah... nevermind, I can't even fake that right now... I do want to go though... It's nice when it's just us." 'just us' meaning him and Ravus without his father around. It wasn't that he hated Regis now but it was awkward between his father and his husband. It was nice to have Ravus in familiar territory without the shadow of his old man over him.